34 years ago....

Today is a very poignant day

Today is the very day I went on my first date at the sweet age of sixteen, the evening was dull but warm and it had started rainnig, my date called for me at 7.45pm and his dad was waiting in the car.
The night was so lovely, we went to the cinema to watch Bruce Lee and then we walked half the way home, I got to have a wonderful first kiss all be it very briefly from the man I was falling head over heals with.
A year later we were arguing as he had just returned from a trip to sea, he was a sailor. Eventually we got together and I gave birth to my son. who is in the picture above with my dad.
I have found that over the years we fought tooth and nail each time we sat quietly together and shared our dreams it was so loving and sometimes very moving.
So today is 34 years ago when I got my first date with the boy who became the man who was to shape the way I viewed my femininity, my love for this man was so strong, I still love him today each time I look at my son I see him smiling back at me.
I went to church a couple of weeks ago, and a medium came to me and brought me a most heart wrenching message from the other side, letting me know how much I was loved and how he will be waiting for me, his mum came through to say she will be looking after him until its your time ,but I have lots of work to do here first so I need to keep healthy.
I could go into more but this was a very personal message and I did sob uncontrollably, I know that I have guardian angels close to me of all kinds, but those who are my loved ones are very precious to me.
Well its time for me to get motivated the weather is beautiful today so I have made a little plan to get into the garden and read. I have a couple of books to catch up on.
But later on I will toast my wonderful guardian angel Lawrence Michael Homan and let him know he is thought each and every day, love more today than yesterday and even more tomorrow.
my love for him is eternal.
Love to those who know that only Love is Real
Love and light
Dee
P.s. the photograph was taken of my dad and my son on 31st July 1976

music and the memories...

I am listening to a mixture of music I have recorded on my media player here on my pc, I feel like reminiscing and putting some verses together but hey lets talk about music and memories.
So far I have 'been to' the blue ridge mountains while Tim Mcgraw sang eyes of a Woman, have you ever listened to the words?
Well I have to say this is the first time I have actually taken in the words, what a beautiful lyric, with a soulful pain came with the chorus.
what you can find in the eyes of a woman, is a reason to believe
look deep inside the eyes of a woman
see the man you wanna be...
wow this could be true of anybody you have a soul connection with.
Then I felt like I was sitting on my friends porch in a wonderful country side called Independence and the view was so heavenly and truly god's country. Sheer peace.
Then on came Luther Vandross who no matter what he is singing will continue to remind me of New York city and the both times I have visited. A House is not a Home has just begun to play, this song will also bring back the memory of going to see Dionne Warwick nearly two years ago, at the local entertainment complex, my best friend came over from Liverpool.
Her first song was this and oh my gosh how she sang this song and dedicated it to Luther, I cried the whole concert was a most beautiful testament to her and the music both my friend and I had grown up together with.
We cried a lot that night and talked until we fell asleep, but knowing that my pal was going back to Liverpool was heartbreaking enough.
Well his velvet chocolate smooth voice leaves me wanting more as the shuffle moves to another artist.
The will then move my memory to shuffle to the next story,Ray Charles comes on singing You Don't know me and again I am transported back to Liverpool, sitting in my pal's house singing and drinking hot chocolate, and laughing cos I keep hitting all the wrong notes, I sit quiet and let the others sing their heads off. It was so wonderful to watch.
My memories keep me close to those I love and those I miss more than I thought. but sharing is a wonderful thing and music is my lifeline to my soul. Music keeps my heart beating to the drum I love, the drum that beats to my world.
Jaheim has just come on Everywhere I am, its a most beautiful song about his mum and how much he misses her but knows she is there in spirit, but he misses her physically so he sings and dedicates this song to her. It gives him comfort to know that when he goes to church his mums friends tell him they can see her in his face and eyes.
If you ever get chance listen to this man's music the album : Still Ghetto is a most diverse piece of music and lyrics.
Well I think I have gone on long enough, My friends my week started quite melancholy and with a huge task ahead of completing a counselling lesson. I am going to share this with you and see what you believe of yourself.
I have been asked to write this sentence and then give myself some answers :
I need to do what is best for me and my health.
I have been a people pleaser most of my life, and always done for others ignoring my own needs, I have now got time to think of me. OH MY ****** its one of the most difficult tasks to focus on myself for the first time in my life. I am emotional I am tearful, I am fearful, I keep looking to others, and trying to step back into my comfort zone. Yet I know I am growing and stepping out of my comfort zone is the best thing I have ever done in my life.
Try it write that sentence down and try to focus on some thing for your self.
Love and light always
Dee
(C) Dees Inspirations

hello.... my first post here

Hello
I am Dee dee and this is my place, I have lots of places you can visit me at.
I am putting myself out there for people to read my writing and to get to know me and what I am becoming.
My life is taking a turn and I am betweeen the devil and the deep blue sea. Hopefully with the patience I dont have but intend to master I will get where I am wishing and wishing hard to be.
The past four months have been a difficult time for me but this past week has been a catalyst really bringing me to a decision to break free of my chains of self limitation and move in bigger circles of life... at my own pace.
well thats it for now and in the coming days weeks and months I hope to be writing more and sharing with you all my dreams and hopes and wishes come true with you out there.